Almost daily I am reminded of the most potent teaching of the Handel Method of coaching; I am the author of my life.
When I first began working with Handel coaches in 2010, I came to understand that my life was built on a series of choices that I’d made. The idea that I’d chosen everything, that everything I was perceiving and experiencing had been my design. At times, this has been strong medicine.
And my authorship goes further. I’m also the author of of failed love relationships. In the past, strained family events. Self-hatred, addiction, regret over careless interactions. I was the author of a volatile temper with my son.
Of course I hadn’t done any of this intentionally, but there was a lesson was waiting to be learned. My lineage, my ancestral tendencies, my personal history: All these were playing out through me. The sad part is that I was telling the story as a victim of my circumstances, as though it was happening to me. The truth that set me free, ultimately, was that it had all happened or been perpetuated through me—and I could author a change as soon as I wished.
Understanding that I am the source of it all is now my privilege, my freedom, my work, my acceptance. Accepting this in myself, I am far more willing to accept this in others. Knowing that we are all, in some way, the authors of our lives, I am more receptive and more deliberate now, which feels like peace.
Being an author means I own my past; poor choices and victories both. Have you taken stock of your 2021 yet and acknowledged how much you learned, grew, experienced, conquered? Now is the time. Take a few moments, and write a little thank you note to this past year—for the teachings, the toughness, the highs, the sweetness.
Being an author also means you’re in charge of this present moment. Choosing actions and thoughts that are in alignment with your highest ideals is a practice for us all. Good choices, great results. Being an author means designing your future too. What dreams do you have for yourself for your future? Here’s an example of one of my dreams for 2022 written in a way that moves me, slightly scares me, calls forth my heart and makes me want to think, plan, and act in accordance with this dream.
Inspiring millions of people to be remarkable in their families, to tell the truth, and to have the hardest conversations is my privilege. I encourage us to practice, meditate, learn together, both virtually and in person. Whether it’s a live event or an online course, when I take my seat as a teacher, I am first a student of the energy, honoring my teachers and the highest Source of all teachings. My writings, meditations, classes, books, and interview assignments map out the practices and behaviors needed to raise the frequency of our planet. Those in contact with my teachers, colleagues, collaborators and me experience their practices and their lives as refuge.